What do we do with our anger after the Bondi Beach attack?

In the wake of something as shocking and heartbreaking as the Bondi Beach attack, anger is one of the first emotions many of us feel. Anger that this could happen. Anger that innocent lives were harmed. Anger mixed with fear, sadness, confusion and a deep sense that something is not right in the world.

Anger, at its core, is not a bad thing. It is a signal. It tells us that something matters, that something precious has been violated. Scripture does not dismiss anger or shame it. Instead, it speaks honestly into it. “In your anger do not sin” (Ephesians 4:26). This short verse tells us two important things at once. First, anger itself is not the problem. Second, anger places us at a crossroads. David Powlison captures this so clearly when he writes, “Great suffering puts us in a fork in the road, and you will choose. The choice is the way of bitterness or the way of grace and mercy.”[1] Both paths begin with the same emotions. Only one leads to life and peace.

It is important to say clearly this is not about “getting over it.” Events like this leave lasting scars for individuals, families, communities and a nation. Some wounds do not simply heal with time. But even in the presence of lasting grief, we still have choices about the direction our anger takes and what it shapes us into.

So, what kinds of responses help move us in a healthy direction rather than allowing anger to harden or divide us?

A healthy response begins with honesty. One of the most important things we can do is to acknowledge what is actually going on inside us, not what we think should be going on. Some people feel intense anger. Others feel fear. Some feel numb. Some feel a confusing mix of all of it. There is no single “right” emotional response to tragedy.

C.S. Lewis once wrote that we must lay before God “what is in us, not what ought to be in us.”[2] God created us as emotional beings, made in his image. Anger, grief, fear and sadness are not signs of spiritual failure or weakness. They are part of being human. Honesty is not the enemy of faith. It is often the doorway to healing.

But what do we do with these emotions once we have named them? Where do we take our anger, fear, despair and questions?

Anger, along with its common companions of fear and despair, become dangerous when they remain closed in, when they circulate endlessly in our thoughts, our media feeds or our echo chambers. A healthier pathway is to bring what is inside us into the light. For people of faith, that means bringing our anger, fear and questions to God. Not cleaned up. Not resolved. Just real. The PeaceWise, Pathway of a godly response gives a framework of how we can do this[3].

It begins with us honestly sharing with God our feelings, emotions and desires through honest prayer along with our grief for what we long to be true but is not.

From this place of honesty, we can bring the hard questions that events of this nature generate. Questions like: Are we safe? Can God be trusted? Will there be justice? The Psalms are filled with cries that sound very much like our own. God is not threatened by our questions or overwhelmed by our grief. He invites us to ask them and wrestle through them.

From there, we are invited to walk a different way, God’s way. “Do not repay anyone evil for evil… Do not take revenge” (Romans 12:17–19). This is not a call to minimise evil or ignore justice. Justice matters deeply to God. Yet scripture reminds us that God’s pursuit of justice was ultimately expressed through love. “This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins” (1 John 4:10). At Christmas, we remember that God moved toward us not with vengeance, but with self-giving love to restore what was broken. “Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another” (1 John 4:11). This is God’s way: pursuing justice without surrendering our hearts to hatred, and allowing love to shape how we seek what is right.

What helps us stay on this path when emotions are running high and voices around us are calling for blame or retaliation?

In times like these, it is wise to be intentional about what we take in. With 24-hour news cycles and social media feeds, it is easy to become saturated with images, commentary and rhetoric that inflame fear and anger. Staying informed is wise. Marinating ourselves in outrage is not. If you notice your anger rising the more you scroll or watch, that is a signal that your heart and nervous system need a pause.

We can apply the same idea as we share and process with each other. Processing together is important. Talking, grieving and reflecting with others helps us make sense of what has happened. But we need to listen in ways that do not turn shared pain into shared rage.

So what might it look like to actively choose good in the face of something so deeply wrong?

One of the most powerful responses to great evil is something surprisingly small.

Scripture points us to it time and time again.

“Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing” (1 Peter 3:9).

Jesus says, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44).

David Powlison captures the idea nicely with these words, “small, good deeds amid great evils are part of becoming free from the waste of our wraths and sorrows.”[4] Small acts of good are not weak or naïve. They are deeply defiant.

These small acts might look like refusing to stereotype or demonize entire groups of people in our own private thoughts or conversations. Being sensitive to the impact of this tragedy on all communities. Speaking gently in heated conversations. Praying for those who are suffering. Supporting thoughtful, just and preventative responses rather than rushing to blame or cynicism. Willing to sit, listen and stand with those who are fearful. In moments like this, none of us can undo what has happened. But all of us can choose how we respond. We can choose a path that deepens fear and division, or one that protects our humanity and draws us back towards one another. That is how peace begins to grow again, even in the shadow of tragedy.

Reflection questions

What emotions surfaced most strongly for you as you heard about the attack?
What does your anger seem to be pointing toward?
When anger rises, which direction do you tend to move toward instinctively?
What would it look like to be honest with God about what is actually in you right now?
How might your media or social media intake be shaping your emotional state?
Who are you listening to most right now, and how is that shaping you?
What is one small act of good you could choose this week?

A closing prayer

In moments of tragedy, anger reminds us that we are still human, that we still care, that love has not gone cold. But anger also asks something of us. It asks which direction we will allow it to take us – toward fear and division, or toward courage, mercy and peace.

At PeaceWise, we believe that peacemaking does not begin with having all the answers. It begins with honest hearts, courageous choices, and small acts of good shaped by the love of Christ. Even in the shadow of great evil, peace can still take root when we choose to walk that way together.

God of mercy and justice, We bring to you our anger, fears, grief, and our questions. Guard our hearts from bitterness. Give us wisdom to choose what is good. Strengthen us to love when it is costly, to speak gently when voices are loud, and to act justly without losing mercy. May your peace take root in us, be reflected through us and help bring healing to a hurting world.

Amen.

If any part of this article has raised concerns or stirred difficult emotions, we encourage you to reach out to someone you trust, such as a friend, family member, or pastor. Alternatively, you may contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 for immediate support.

[1] Powlison D. 2016, Good and Angry: Redeeming anger, irritation, complaining and bitterness. New Growth Press, p176

[2] CS Lewis, Letters to Malcolm chiefly on prayer

[3] You can find out more about the Pathway of a godly response on the PeaceWise app in the getting to the heart tool.

[4] Powlison D. 2016, Good and Angry: Redeeming anger, irritation, complaining and bitterness. New Growth Press, p177